Every Time a Bell Rings…

What a week it has been.  I cannot believe that one week ago I was just getting home from my grandpa’s wake.  Seriously, whoa.  What happened?  Well, he became peaceful and answered our prayers for no more suffering.  We all got together for Christmas Eve – all minus one.  We weren’t all sure if we should get together, but it was good for us all – soothing.  Later that night, Grandpa became irritable and early Christmas morning, he sat in a chair with his feet up and passed.  

This is the first adult bout of death I have had to deal with.  I say I am blessed but I also felt unprepared.  My grandpa is one of my heros, this will not change.  He is the bravest, strongest, most loving, loyal and old school man I have known.  He made sure that Grandma was taken care of, that we were all taken care of by each other and then he went.  He will forever be my Christmas angel and he has single handedly changed my outlook on “It’s a Wonderful Life”.  I have always loved it, but I now love it more.  We watched it before going to sleep on Christmas Eve and when I woke to the bell of my phone, it was to hear he was no longer with us.  
I am thankful that I have not gotten angry about Grandpa’s death.  It seems silly for me to get angry.  I understand if Grandma or Mom get angry – I would as well in their position, but for me…I can’t.  I have been so blessed to have had him for the past 29 years to help mentor me and help me discover what I want out of life, love and happiness.  I got a lifetime that most are not as blessed to have.

Grandpa – you continue to amaze me even when you are gone…people continue to talk about you, people are sad they never had the opportunity to know you.  I love you – I will always love you.  You take care until I see you again, keep watch over those fish…there are no good-byes here.


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